Throughout my own journey, one of the biggest and most important things that I have developed is unconditional love for myself. This wasn't always so.
Couple years ago when I was ending my first real long-term relationship, I have came to realization that at that point I didn't really know who I was as my own self. One of the biggest problems that I'm seeing in relationships now having went through my own transformation, is that people in relationships tend to lose their identity. Or even worse, people get into serious relationships so early on, before their own identity has even began to form. As that was in my case. And I'm not here to say that I was not happy in my relationship with who I was at that time, but I can certainly say that it was not who I am today.
After leaving the relationship I had a lot of fear about moving forward with my life. I knew that I would have to start all over again, as the people that came with that relationship where all the sudden gone. I realized as my awareness of my self was shifting those people were no longer aligned with whom I started to become. It made my transition easier knowing that eventually I will find my soul tribe, my people who will resonate with the new energy that I was waking up to.
It's took me a long time to start fully loving myself, and accepting myself just who I was at that particular period. I had to gain a lot of courage in order to step out into the world all by myself without having a partner to hold my hand in case things got tough. I really do have to pay a lot of gratitude for my family and especially my mom who have been my best friend during that whole transition.
When I talk about self-love I talk about full acceptance of who we are right now. We might not be exactly where we wish to be, however the journey starts with accepting yourself exactly in the moment as you are. Having the awareness of who you are in that moment, is very much necessary in order to know which way you wish to keep moving forward and what characteristics you wish to let go and gain in order to become a better version of yourself.
I teach people to never compare themselves to others, because you are one of a kind. I myself have struggled with this as I used to compare myself to other people especially when it came to figuring out what is my gift that I am here to offer to the world. I used to look at other healers, teachers and spiritual guides and I would look through their website and see their business prospering and I would feel so confused and disappointed that here they are doing this great work, while I'm here confused and unsure where to even start. Little did I know all that was so necessary for my path and had taught be a great lesson to NEVER compare.
As my journey progressed, I began to travel, meeting new people, and learned so much more about myself that I finally started to gain that confidence and self-esteem, because I was slowly shifting into my authentic self. I believe there's a huge difference between self-esteem that is driven from the side of humble attitude vs the one driven from the ego side. I can honestly say that the confidence and self-esteem that I had during my relationship was mostly driven from the ego. From thinking that I was better than everybody else, while being completely blind to the truth that was only discovered years later.
True self-esteem stands from knowing who you are deep down, not who you are trying to portray yourself as to the world. I find that many people put on masks and are so afraid of being vulnerable with their true feelings that they go entire lives living in their own lie.
So when I talk about loving yourself what I truly mean: is accepting yourself as you are knowing your imperfections, your inner issues and seeing which asserts are not who you truly are. Followed by being open to bettering yourself in anyway you see needed for your journey to go where you want to go. The path isn't easy, yet its incredible to look back and see how far you've come.
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